Robert Paul Reyes

“A southwest Florida church issued a challenge for its married members this past Sunday: Hanky panky every day.

Relevant Church head pastor Paul Wirth says the 50% divorce rate was the catalyst for The 30-Day Sex Challenge.’”

Quotation from the Associated Press

Organized religion often portrays sex as a joyless duty to procreate; it’s great to see a preacher urging his congregation to engage in carnal relations for thirty straight days.

The challenge is only for married members of the church, singles and non-married couples are urged to remain chaste. However singles and those “shacking up” don’t need a challenge to have sex every day; they willingly make love every chance they get.

But once you buy the cow, milking it becomes a chore to be avoided whenever possible. Asking married couples to make whoopie every day is cruel and unusual punishment.

Pastor Wirth is misguided, it’s not sex but love that binds a married couple. It’s not a romp in the sack, but a hug or a gentle kiss that a neglected spouse misses the most.

Lack of sex is not the reason why the divorce rate is so high. People divorce because they are married to their jobs, and they have little or no time to work on their marriage.

Instead of requesting that married couples have “hanky panky” every day, the pastor should urge them to spend quality time on a daily basis. That can mean anything from talking or exercising together to making love.

It seems like eons ago that pundits and politicians were asking: Is Sen. Barack Obama black enough? That well educated people, including prominent members of the black intelligentsia, were posing this query shows how far we still need to go to expunge racism from our society.

Obama is an articulate and intelligent gentleman, with an impressive resume: Graduate of Harvard Law School, community organizer, bestselling author, Grammy Award winner for Best Spoken Word Album, member of the Illinois State Senate, United States Senator and candidate for President of the United States of America.

Did Obama need to let his pants drop down to his knees and speak in Ebonics before he could be accepted as a bonafide African American?

Before a single vote was cast, when Sen. Hillary Clinton had a double digit lead in the national polls, most of the Black establishment was solidly behind the former First Lady. Unfortunately, too many of the older black leaders still have the mindset that only a white politician has the gravitas to advance the cause of civil rights. These dinosaurs, like Rep. Charlie Rangel, don’t represent the best interests of their black constituents.

But when the Hillary Clinton surrogates injected race into the campaign, African Americans realized that Obama was indeed one of their own. Here was an incredibly gifted leader who was being described by his race and not by his myriad talents.

Thanks to the race card played by Bill Clinton, Obama is now garnering an overwhelming majority of the black vote. But it’s not just African Americans that are voting for Obama, the senator from Illinois is trouncing Hillary is almost every imaginable demographic.

I hope that Bill Clinton is never again referred to as “the first African American president”, a desperate race-baiting politician doesn’t deserve that title.

Members of the Congressional Black Caucus, like Charles Rangel and John Lewis, who automatically backed Hillary Clinton last year, before they were even familiar with Obama’s platform, should pay a political price for their timidity and subservience. Their constituents should send a strong message, and not reelect them to Congress.

I’m not saying that a black politician should automatically vote for a black candidate. But Rangel announced his support for Hillary last year, because at that time she seemed like the inevitable Democratic nominee.

I voted for Barack Obama in the Virginia primary, because he is the most qualified and inspirational candidate. I didn’t consider his race, I looked only at his sterling achievements in the Illinois State Senate and the US Senate.

I can’t wait until Sen. Barack Obama is inaugurated as the next president of the United States. He is by far the most qualified candidate, who just happens to be black.

“The Merriam Webster Dictionary definition for flatulence is brief: “flatus expelled through the anus.” And while it’s a natural bodily function, it seems some Camden-Rockport Middle School eighth-grade boys are taking it to new heights and making a game of seeing who can expel the loudest and grossest flatus.

According to this week’s Fire Cracker school newsletter though, the joke’s on the boys as the penalty for “intentional farting” is now a detention.”

Quotation from knox.villagesoup.com

Young boys don’t know the meaning of proper etiquette; they fart, pick at boogers, eat with their fingers, spit indiscriminately, and engage in many other disgusting habits.

I’m not surprised that middle school boys have refined farting into a game. It would take a severe behavior modification program to stop boys from engaging in such tomfoolery.

Detention should be reserved for serious infractions, and not for behavior that is normal, albeit gross, for teenagers.

How can a teacher determine if an episode of farting is intentional? If the suspect lifts a cheek, or has a huge smile on his face when he lets loose — we can assume it’s intentional. But I know an old coot who farts all the time, I suspect he does it on purpose, but he doesn’t give himself away by smiling or any other suspicious behavior.

The eight-grade boys will outgrow their penchant for farting once they realize it doesn’t go over very well with girls. The Camden-Rockport Middle School should disband their fart police, and concentrate on teaching reading, riting and rithmethic.

When I consider the presidential campaign of Sen. Barack Obama, I’m reminded of the eloquence of Dr. Martin Luther King, the dream of Camelot, the energy of youth, and the revolutionary zeal of a Washington outsider.

In Obama I glimpse the light at the of the end of the tunnel in Iraq, the end of the demonization of immigrants, and the resurrection of the American Dream.

Obama represents the American ideal that there are no limits to what a hardworking, intelligent visionary can accomplish.

Only a cynical politician would disdain the myriad successes of Sen. Obama and see only the color of his skin.

Welcome to Bill Clinton, who dismissed Obama’s rout of Hillary in South Carolina with a comparison to the Rev. Jesse Jackson’s previous losing presidential bids.

Bill Clinton’s “Jesse Jackson comment” was only the latest in a series of racially-tinged comments about Obama. There is no need for me to list the litany of racial comments, they’ve been repeated endlessly in the media.

Bill is appealing to the worst instincts of Americans, reminding us that Obama is black, and that like Jesse Jackson, the senator from Illinois is destined to lose.

I reject the notion that America isn’t ready to elect a black president. Iowa is proof that our great nation is willing and ready to elect an African American to the White House.

Our democracy has evolved past the politics of race-baiting, and I’m hopeful that on Super Tuesday, patriots of all colors will vote for the unity and hope embodied by Obama and reject the divisiveness and cynicism expressed by Bill Clinton.

“Upset that his 7-year-old son wouldn’t wear a Green Bay Packers jersey during the team’s playoff victory Saturday, a man restrained the boy for an hour with tape and taped the jersey onto him.Mathew Kowald was cited for disorderly conduct in connection with the incident with his son at their home in Pardeeville, Lt. Wayne Smith of the Columbia County Sheriff’s Department said. Pardeeville is about 30 miles north of Madison.”

Quotation from the Associated Press

I’m going to take the contrarian view and defend the actions of Mr. Kowald. In Wisconsin Packermania is a religion, and it stands to reason that a father would want his child to celebrate a playoff victory by donning a Packers’ jersey. The frozen tundra of Lambeau Field is more sacred than the National Cathedral, and the 7-year-old brat should have shown more reverence to the gridiron heroes of Green Bay.

I’m not a Packers fan, but  their come from behind victory was so dramatic that even I felt compelled to wear a giant cheese head.

If Catholic parents had a son who ripped off his crucifix from his neck, nobody would bat an eye if the little creep got his butt spanked. Let’s be a little bit more understanding of Kowald’s outrage at his son’s obstinacy.

Kowald wasn’t cruel to his son, he didn’t force the disobedient little jerk to wear a Miami Dolphin’s jersey. Under the circumstances I think Kowald should be praised for exercising such remarkable restraint.

If the Packers make it to the Super Bowl, perhaps the kid should stay with Grandma  — no telling what Kowald will do to him if he refuses to wear a Packer’s jersey during such a critical game.

Editorial Note: This essay is “tongue in cheek” please don’t fill my inbox with letters accusing me of condoning child abuse.

“In an interview with Major Garrett in New Hampshire last week, Clinton criticized the analogy Obama had drawn between his own hopeful campaign and the words of Dr King —saying ‘I would point to the fact that Dr King´s dream began to be realized when President Johnson passed the Civil Rights Act… That dream became a reality, the power of that dream became real in people´s lives because we had a president who said we were going to do it, and actually got it accomplished.’”

Quotation from FoxNews.Com

It is sacrosanct that Martin Luther King is a monumental historical figure who changed the course of American history.  Martin Luther King, where do I begin? The Montgomery Bus Boycott that kicked off his involvement in civil rights. The1963 “I Have a Dream” speech that brought whites and blacks to tears; giving us a spark of hope that one day this nation will truly be colorblind. The 1964 Nobel Peace Prize, a symbol of King’s tireless efforts to end segregation and racial discrimination through civil disobedience and other non violent means — in the face of police dogs and cops who were more brutal than their dogs. The Letter from the Birmingham Jail and other important writings that inspire people of all races and creeds. I’m writing an essay and not a book — I’d better stop here.

Only a fool, a racist , or a desperate politician would seek to diminish the integrity or influence of Martin Luther King.
 
Enter Hillary Clinton, frantic after losing in Iowa, she  injected race into the 2008 campaign. Recently Clinton and her surrogates have made a string of racially-tinged comments.
 
This latest racist comment by Hillary tells us everything we need to know about her.

Hillary lives and breathes politics, she thinks that only the government can bring about change. She disparages the efforts of Martin Luther King and gives President Johnson all the credit for the tremendous strides toward racial equality that took place in the 1960’s.
 
President Johnson should be commended for signing the Civil Rights Act, but it was King’s speeches, essays, demonstrations and sweat and blood that spurred him into action.
 
It’s gifted individuals like King, with their dreams, sweat and blood, who change history, not career politicians like Hillary Clinton.
 
The choice for Democrats is clear: Will you vote for a cynical politician like Hillary Clinton who has forgotten how to dream, or a fresh face like Barack Obama who still believes in the dream of a nation at peace with itself and at peace with the world community?
 

“Germany’s latest celebrity polar bear cub remains nameless — but already boasts a dedicated Web site providing details of its health and giving readers a chance to christen the cuddly creature. The city of Nuremberg, in cooperation with its zoo, launched the site on Friday — luring viewers with a gallery of photos of the winsome 4-week-old cub.”

Quotation from the Associated Press

This human interest (polar bear interest?) story illustrates the truth that in our hi-tech world it’s critical to have an online presence. German’s latest polar bear cub celebrity may not have a name yet, but she has a Web site.

You don’t have to travel to Germany to interact with the adorable cub, you can go to her Web site and admire her pictures.  Hey, it’s more wholesome than searching the Internet for naughty images of Britney Spears.

Multitudes of Americans google themselves on a daily basis to validate their existence. My name appears on a Google search — therefore I am. If you don’t have a homepage on the Web, there is little evidence to support that you are an important member of your community.

Some parents even create Web pages for their infants; how embarrassing if an infant has more hits than you.

“For now, the zoo’s keepers have dubbed the cub, thought to be female, Flocke — German for flake, as in snow flake — because of its brilliantly white and fluffy fur.”

Quote from the Associated Press

I googled “Flocke” “polar bear”  and at least for now I have many more hits than the cute cub. I don’t want any baby, even one as loveable as Flocke having more hits than this humble columnist.

If you want to check out the cub’s Web site go to: www.eisbaer.nuernberg.de

“Performance art is art in which the actions of an individual or a group at a particular place and in a particular time constitute the work. It can happen anywhere, at any time, or for any length of time.”

Quotation from Wikipedia

Performance art pushes the envelope; I lived in San Francisco for 41 years and I witnessed a few shocking examples of this art form.

Some performance artists, like Karen Finley, incorporate nudity and themes or words that are deemed obscene by mainstream culture. These artists deliberatley seek to shock, not as an end in itself, but for the purpose of making people think about issues that are ignored by genteel society.

We are living in such chaotic times that it’s sometimes impossible to differentiate performance art from random acts of insanity. Britney Spears flashing her vagina: Performance art, publicity stunt or insanity?

Britney’s serial flashing doesn’t qualify as performance art — it doesn’t make us contemplate any issue other than curiosity as to what brand of razor she uses to achieve such a close shave.

The following story from the Associated Press gives us an example of a real life incident that could be mistaken for performance art:

“Detective Travis Rapp has seen his share of corpses, but this was new: two men wheeling a rigid, pale body down a Manhattan street in a red office chair, drawing a crowd of suspicious onlookers.

Looking out the window of the restaurant where he was having lunch, Rapp initially assumed ‘it was a mannequin or a dummy,’ he said. ‘I thought it was a joke, honestly.’

A closer inspection showed that it wasn’t. The man was dead, and two of his friends had hauled his corpse to a store to cash his $355 Social Security check, police said. They were arrested before they could get the money.”

It’s hard to say what is more shocking: The stupidity of these two losers or their disdain of ethical norms.

When real life resembles a movie or performance art — we are in deep trouble.

“A man lay dead in his apartment in Australia’s largest city for a year before anyone noticed, officials and news reports said Thursday.

The body of Jorge Chambe, 64, was found on Tuesday in his single bedroom, government-owned flat in the Sydney suburb of Yagoona when police and firefighters broke in, after concerns about his welfare were finally raised.

…

In news reports, neighbors at the apartment block described Chambe as a quiet man who was friendly but who kept mostly to himself. He had received federal government welfare payments and his rent was paid automatically by direct debit from his bank account.”

Quotation from the Associated Press

It’s impossible to live in Western society without developing myriad relationships with family, friends, Internet pals, workout buddies, bar fly comrades and business associates.

An individual who lives by himself and dies in his home, will quickly be missed by creditors, friends and co-workers. In a matter of days someone will raise an alarm and the authorities will be dispatched to his residence.

Unfortunately, too many elderly persons don’t have anyone to watch out for their welfare. Most of their friends have passed away and they are shunned and neglected by their family members.

What a sad state of affairs when a senior citizen person can die at home and not have his corpse discovered for a year.

We are too busy to care about the welfare of our neighbors; didn’t anybody notice that this poor neglected fellow never came out of his home? Didn’t anybody think it strange that his mailbox was overflowing?

We need to return to the time when the retired were revered and sought after for their wisdom.

I hope that my readers will be inspired to visit the many old folks who have been abandoned in convalescent homes.

Sen. Barack Obama is a gifted orator who has that rare ability to move people to political action. Barack’s speeches have persuaded young people and first time voters of all ages to become involved in the political process.

Obama reminds me of Robert Kennedy and Martin Luther King; if elected president he has an opportunity to change the culture like these giants of history.

Recently one politician of note dismissed Obama as a “kid”, and another one implied that Obama was “shucking and jiving” Who are these men who uttered these blatantly racially-tinged comments? Noted racist Pat Buchanan? Ron Paul? David Duke?

Believe it or not it was Bill Clinton, the so-called first African American president, who referred to Obama as a “kid”.

And it was New York Attorney General and Hillary supporter, Andrew Cuomo, who made the followed statement:

”It’s not a TV crazed race. Frankly you can’t buy your way into it. You can’t shuck and jive at a press conference. All those moves you can make with the press don’t work when you’re in someone’s living room.”

“Shuck and Jive” is a phrase that has historically been used to dismiss prominent blacks as fast-talking hucksters with no substance or integrity.

Hillary enablers have defended Cuomo by arguing that he was using black idiom in a misguided attempt to “be cool”. Bullcrap! African Americans don’t commonly use the phrase “shuck and jive”, it’s used by white racists to ridicule blacks.

The Clintons will do anything to achieve power; Hillary the Iron Lady feminist conjured up tears to woo female voters, and she is using her surrogates to play to play racial politics.

The Clintons are a divisive and malignant force in American politics. We need a breath of fresh air and much needed change that only Sen. Barack Obama can accomplish.